TIPS TO AVOID WEIGHT GAIN

While losing weight year round requires focus and discipline it is almost impossible to see the pounds go away during the holidays. In fact, in the span of 6 or so weeks the average weight gain is about 11 pounds. Ask any one who is trying to make a fitness/health LIFESTYLE change and most likely they will, however, during the holidays the stress of not only losing weight but not gaining weight is almost impossible. While I personally have kept off 140 pounds for over 30 years, even I feel and see the temptation every day. Here are five tips that have not only helped me but have helped my clients to get through the holidays without gaining weight.

1.       MOVE, MOVE AND MOVE I cannot say it enough times that exercising should be a part of anyone’s daily routine and that during the holidays that should not change... Exercise will not only help to burn calories but more importantly it will help with sleep and stress. Stress is usually at an all time high during the holidays, especially for women, a workout 3 times a week will not only make you look good but you will feel so much better.

2.       Drinking- during the holidays usually goes along with overeating and that will a recipe for catastrophe come the New Year. Alcohol has empty calories and will pack on the pounds. Drinking things like eggnog and fancy mixed drinks are not great choices so stick with a glass of wine and the white liquors with either club diet soda or if you must a diet soda. Pick special parties or occasions and stick to the plan. 

3.       Overeating during the holidays is almost a ritual with some people. To avoid a total disaster, make sure that you are eating a good first meal of the day that is packed with vitamins and nutrients. Do not go all day without eating as you will surely give yourself permission to eat everything in sight. Try to have fruits, yogurts, eggs, turkey bacon, and whole grain cereal. You will feel better and not set yourself up for binge eating.  

4.       Binge eating is at an all time high during the holidays. Make it a point to pace you out and eat meals that have fruits and veggies in them. Have a salad that is packed with healthy foods. This will prevent that starving and binge way of life that some have during the holidays.

5.       Get back on track, if you have good intentions and still start to overeat and binge, take a deep breathe and know that tomorrow you will get back on track. Do not keep saying that I will start again in January, do it right now. If you tell yourself you can you will? You can do this, you are more powerful that any cookie, candy or cake any day of the week. I hope you have a great holiday and remember you can do this.

Debra Mazda, M. Ed,. CPT is a trainer, speaker, author, fitness instructor and creator of ShapelyGirl Fitness DVD’s., workouts that are motivating and inspirational.  Debra’s mission is to get women off the couch and moving because “fitness comes in many sizes”. Debra’s new book “EATING MY SHAME” will be published Spring 2018. Mazda’s fitness DVD’s and newsletter are available at www.debramazda.com

Mindful Thanksgiving

Thanksgiving is right around the corner and this season can be a very stressful time of the year when it comes to staying on a fitness routine and eating healthy.  Food is usually in abundance and parties are frequent.

While Thanksgiving is considered the beginning of the holidays, it does not have to be the beginning of month long food fest of overeating and binging putting on the 5-7 pounds that most experts say the average weight gain is for the holidays.. this is so unhealthy physically, mentally and emotionally, not only will the emotions get the best of you but that weight that you gain will be so hard to take off, trust me I have been there in my younger years.

Listen to me, there is a better way as I truly believe that anyone can get through the holidays without eating till you can't  breathe or better yet can't zipper your jeans. Yes, you can get through that fat laden, calorie enhanced and sugar ridden meal that can pack in as much as 4,000 calories. Begin by pacing yourself and pick and choose what and when you will eat and think MINDFULLY about those choices you need to make.  Here are a couple of ideas and tips to help you make it without eating the kitchen sink. First, make sure you are exercising.

Most times exercise will keep you motivated and on track, if not your fitness routine takes a back seat that sets up a roller coaster ride for a train wreck and opens the door to poor eating choices, Staying on track translates into we are doing something great for ourselves and that will keep us motivated. If not, most good eating habits begin to go south, when one sinks they both go down. Without exercise and eating sensibly, those pounds while start to pack on and you can experience lack of energy, not enough sleep, feely bloated and worse feeling miserable. I have said this over and over, if you can get through Thanksgiving Day half of the battle is won. That one day of either eating sensibly or not so sensibly will set you up for the next 4 weeks that will lead us into the New Year. Do yourself a big favor; eat one good meal on Thanksgiving Day like a good breakfast so you are not famished at the dinner table. Enjoy the day, family, friends and celebrate you. You can make it, I know you can.  

Motivation to make changes, what will it take?

WHAT WOULD MOTIVATE YOU TO EAT HEALTHY AND WORKOUT?

 

Each one of us is so different when it comes to thinking about ourselves and our health. Some of us are just motivated and for some it takes a little help to get you going.  I have compiled a list of  topics that just might make you stop and get that light bulb ah ha moment.

More Debra Mazda

Journaling

Setting goal and having my partner as incentive

A different brain

A workout partner

More determination

If I didn’t have stretch marks

Workout partner

Someone who takes personal interest in me

Something to address hunger

Positive people

Learning to handle emotion

Weight loss more motivating than health

How to overcome pain

Doing a more fun workout

Learning how to not be so lazy

Getting junk food out of my house

Personal chef

Support, support, support

More friends & encouragement

Group class that would motivate me to be accountable for my food choices and regular exercise

Learning about food varieties

 

I want to get YOU moving and off of the couch for better health. I want to get YOU eating better no matter what.  SO, WHAT WILL IT TAKE. Let me know or better yet if you have a better idea let me know about it..

 

HUGS, DEBRA

 

 

Food Freedom, Mindful Eating

I am calling on all women and men who are always on a diet, consistently giving up foods they love worrying about overeating or even some of you who struggle everyday with food choices to put aside all of that craziness for ONE DAY and just eat what you want on Tuesday, June 7th.  On that day, no dieting, no counting calories, no food anxiety and absolutely no fear that you are eating what our society calls off limit foods. Just a day to eat what you want, when you want to but most of all enjoy it. A day when all foods are on the table. I call this a day of FOOD FREEDOM. Now, before you jump for joy, I am not suggesting that anyone eat hundreds of calories or binge eat all day long. I did not say eat as much as you want, just eat what you want, SENSIBLY. This will be a day of not only eating what you want but it gives you a chance to begin to practice MINDFUL EATING  so you can make choices that you can live with. YOU want pizza, have a slice or two not the whole pie. YOU want ice cream, have a scoop or cone with sprinkles and enjoy it, you do not have to eat the whole half-gallon. While I understand that these foods have high sugars and carbs in them, the reality is, these are foods most of us love and WE need to learn how to eat and enjoy them SENSIBLY.  If we do not learn how to eat sensibly, these foods eventually work their way back into our lives and the outcome most certainly will be eating till you cannot breath, then feeling horrible that you did something wrong. Why not learn that you can eat all foods even the one's that we consider off limits, OCCASIONALLY. Yes, you can sit and enjoy your choice by not depriving yourself. How about this thought, just bypass it and have the it later or whenever you want it. Again, this will be your choice but I BELEIVE that you can do this with time and practice. There is no GUILT here only MINDFUL choices. For most who binge or eat out of emotions it is time to look closely at change and what you are trying to change. I can almost guarantee you that most of us have some usually deeply-rooted habits that have become ingrained over a long time which require awareness to change. And that’s what mindfulness is all about. For those of you who feel you cannot just have one bite for fear of devouring it all, let me remind you that by learning this way of eating you will stop being a slave to food because food slavery is emotional death for anyone. While I am calling this day Eat what you want day, the goal is to begin to understand that you can eat mindfully. Mindful behavior is thinking about your choice before you react. THING FIRST, REACT LATER! This is the new and responsible way to eat especially for your sanity. I can almost guarantee you that when you eat what you want you will focus as to what is going in your mouth. When you are dieting, starving, or are restricting yourself the choice is mute. We both know that gets old quickly, then the wanting and craving begin, after that the next step is that you want everything in sight and lots of it. That is what is called on or off eating.  What I am trying to get across to some of you that is does not have to be this way. YES, it will take time but in the end you will have more control over your eating and your life.

How do I know this? BEEN THERE/DONE THAT. I was a slave to food and a binge eater for many years and this was a very unhealthy lifestyle.Those were the days I thought of nothing else but my next meal. Restrictive eating for weeks and then boom one day I had enough of that and then my brain as well as emotions went haywire and I would eat until I could not breath. Once I slowly began to learn that I could eat what I wanted it was like REALLY. I learned that I could say NO, have it later and  then take a sigh of relief, I could slowly breathe again.  Today, while I practice being mindful I still have my days of wanting to eat everything that I smell and see but I know I can make choices and that I am responsible for those choices. For some of you who are used to eating on or off this sounds crazy but I can be confident in telling you give yourself one day of freedom. I can honestly say that  basically I eat what I want in a sensible way. It works almost every time because I think about it MINDFULLY. I began to eat this way after many years of dieting, feeling depressed, losing/gaining weight constantly and feeling like I could never feel good about myself. Most of you know what I mean by this, letting food control our every move almost daily.  While I was on those crazy diets, (I have been on all of them) I would stay on program but when I went off I would eat everything in sight. Today while I can have ice cream whenever I want it, I only think about having it rarely because I can have it any time I want it. This is is how powerful our minds once we decide to start to change our way of thinking. Today, I very rarely have battles in my head fighting my daily choices and that is a GREAT place to be.

The research is now showing us that mindful eating is the new way to eat. YOU will be making choices that you can think about and live with and not just eat out of emotions setting yourself up for a binge leading to feeling like a failure and just feeling horrible. I know so many women who have told me that once they allowed themselves to just eat they lost weight because they could have any foods any time and where not restricted to some crazy food program making themselves crazy. So, while you may think it is not that simple, it really is, make a DECISION and stick to it, the choice is YOURS!!!! Let me know how you did once you get through one day! Remember, YOU CAN DO THIS!

Why do we sabotage ourselves?

QUESTION:
I have been doing great with my eating for a little over a month. I have not binged and have eaten foods that really made me feel better. Then after getting weighed I realized that I lost over 10 pounds and had a melt down, after that I felt myself slipping back to my old ways and it really has taken a toll on me emotionally.  I realize that every time I begin to get healthy I get overwhelmed, scared and resort back to my old self. Is this normal and do others experience this? Susan

 First, let me say that YES this reaction is normal and YES other women including myself  have experienced this in our lives. The good news is that women can overcome this as I did and so have many others.

Answer:
In the thirty plus years that I have been training, coaching, mentoring, running groups and counseling women this is the question that comes up in conversation most of the time. Why do women loathe themselves and set themselves up for failure and set backs while on the road to getting healthy as well as feeling better? This is a very deep rooted as well as complicated matter so let's really look at this issue.

For many women who grew up as overweight children the issue of negative body image, body weight and self esteem begins at a very early age. For a lot of these young girls dieting, being thin and pretty is the message that their hear over and over and eventually that voice begins to control their lives. They are unconsciously told to shed those pounds or you are doomed into a life of hating your body and yourself.  For some, life then becomes a daily regime of self hated and self loathing while trying to achieve this utopia. Magazine articles that portray the latest diet, fitness regime to acquire six pack abs or even the latest Hollywood celebrity's diet regime for weight loss leaves an overweight women with a doom or gloom future. This sets her up an emotional roller coaster ride of negativity because this message embedded from childhood  has now become a way of life and their reality. As someone who heard those messages over and over as a young girl and then as a teenager I learned that what we see and hear in our early lives will eventually resonate in our adulthood and in turn makes us look at how we look and think about ourselves. Growing up in a society that sends a message that any excess weight is not acceptable so get rid of it NOW is damaging! Turn on the TV to hear about the latest diet or many fitness DVD's  promising you long term success, 99% of the so called Fitness celebrities have no clue over the emotional damage they do promising these simple and easy weight loss routine that are short on long term success. Yet we continue to buy it hoping for a better life. These bombardments of cerebral messages leave us with a sense  that we no longer know what we need for our lives. Years of years of these messages and the race to another diet, hating food and not knowing how to really understand what we need will leave anyone banging their heads against the wall for relief. While I totally understand that some need this kick start to get motivated let me remind you that motivation needs to come from within to achieve any long term success.  Looking to the world for answers, fighting with food,  starvation and feeling like a failure sets us up for emptiness. All of those years of negative voices and looking at who you are as less than worthy leaves us in a pile of pain. So, when you begin to try to get healthy, lose some weight and get fit to feel better what you only know is how to sabotage yourself with setting yourself up for failure. Once this happens one feels emotionally, physically and mentally drained and hence runs back to what is familiar. In my own life I have had to fight this battle early on as I lost and gained weight more times that I can count on both hands. I never really addressed the emotions that were holding me back till I began to really understand that my early years where filled with emotions that dragged me down. So, you can now get a glimpse that when the road to recovery begins to take place it takes more than changing your eating habits.  It takes a change of heart and how we look at ourselves and that YES we are worth it, we can achieve it long term and YES it will take time, love and patience from within Today, after many years of tears, groups, writing and listening I realize that unless we address the issue we will never totally come to a point of understanding ourselves and finding peace.

Hugs, Debra



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Should I get weighed every day?

Many years ago a personal training client of mine who eventually became a very close girlfriend revealed to me that as a teenager her mother made her get weighed everyday. She went on to tell me that she remembered this ritual like it was yesterday and that many of her eating, food and self esteem issues all revolved around that 3-5 minutes a day. Because of this she was paralyzed for many years and isolated herself from the outside world as it was hard for her to socialize and that her fear of overeating in public overwhelmed her. It seemed that her mother would constantly tell her that she needed to be thin in order to get a boyfriend and that men did not want fat women as wives, so her solution to thinness was to have her get weighed daily. Yes, that would do it! That was over 45 years ago but somehow today this thinking has not changed. Not the boyfriend or husband part but the part as to why we allow those numbers to dictate us and for most women they do. We live in a society where the majority of women still believe that what we weigh is our biggest problem and that somehow when we overcome those dreaded extra pounds life will get peachy and the marriage proposals will come flooding our front door. Today in most circles the underlying message is clear, be thin at any cost. But I ask, what is that cost? Most times it is emotional and mental torture. My friend talked to me extensively about her issues with food and that food was certainly not the nourishment she needed but the enemy that robbed her a healthy life. Now while you might say that this is an extreme case I ask you to think about your own eating and food issues. Do they revolve around getting weighed daily, once a week, once a month of perhaps you do not get weighed? For some women getting weighed it still a mental ritual, have good weigh in day, I feel great, a bad weigh in day, I feel horrible and I binge might even be on the horizon.. Think I am wrong, go sit in any controlled weight loss group such as weight watchers  and observe the members once they come off of the scale. Now I have nothing against weight watchers and I am talking about every women as there are some who have accepted that we are all not going to be a thin but we can all be healthy without letting the scale rule us.  Wherever you stand on this podium the fact remains that most women are ruled by the what they weigh and that list of reasons goes on and on. Although I have not seen my friend for quite some time as our lives took different paths  I sometimes wonder if she got the help she needed, or if she is still ruled by those 3 numbers on that  aluminum flatbed. So, when should you get weighed? That is up to you and while I have nothing against getting weighed just do not let it dictate who you are and rule your life! Have a blessed day!





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MOTIVATION, we all need it!

 Last week I ran into an old friend of mine who I had not seen for quite some time.  Upon seeing her again it was apparent that she had gained a lot of weight in the past year. Before I could give her a hug to say hello she disclosed to me about how horrible she felt and was almost in tears out of  sheer embarrassment.  Well, that hug turned out the more than a hello, that physical connection was to let her know that I could totally understand how she was feeling and take the pressure off  her at that moment. I did not want her to feel judged about these emotions so I began to share with her my own struggles that  revolved around weight obsession, emotional eating and negative body image . And while that thinking seemed so far behind me now at that very moment it seemed like yesterday when my mind and emotions were filled with anxiety, depression and  never ending chaos. With much anxiety she told me that she was so upset and embarrassed because she “let her go.”  by putting this weight on.  I told that she was not alone and that millions of women go through the same trauma every day but there is light at the end of the tunnel. While emotions might run deep now she was in the path of what could be colorful rainbow in her path and she needed to see it and reach for it.

 For many years I ate myself into a never ending trail of  denial and could not get my eating under control.  I remember years of insanity and how food was the only comfort that I relied on in a world of craziness. Some how  though when it hits you personally you are likely to think you are in this solo and that there is no one who understands. But for many they do GET IT  and are in a similar situations.  She confessed that she was feeling depressed and was desperate to lose the weight and get back into a fitness routine, the only problem was that she could not find the WILL to do it. She said she thought about it all of the time but somehow just could not get up and do it. Sound familiar?  Sure it does, as this happens to millions of women every day. The want is there but that is where it stops.  She was not sure how she gained this weight  but one day she woke up and there were more, hips, butts and thighs on her body. SOUND FAMILIAR? It did to me. While she laughed about it again I could see and feel her distress.  I remember that devastation of wanting to give up and waking up one day to more hips, thighs and belly and  how could I turn this around so I could look and feel better.  I wanted her to know she was not alone in this journey and that most who have issues with weight and eating could easily call it quits and just give up for a period of time. I remember having this conversation in my own head many times over the span of many years. I told her that now is NOT the time to  isolate but get support from those who will not judge or try to fix you. It is time to start over again and to move on and that I truly believed in her but she needed to believe not only in herself  but to know that she deserved to feel and look better. I told her that she was worth feeling better but would that make her begin to get on track. Now is the time to get up and begin again. 

Obesity and Alzheimer's Disease

Most of us know that obesity has been linked to a whole host of diseases such as diabetes, some cancers and cardio vascular disease. New research has just been documented that obesity is linked to Alzheimer disease as well.

Researchers specifically found that obesity in middle age predicts an earlier onset of Alzheimer disease, not only that but a higher burden of disease will be more severe when it hits. Some researchers in Baltimore who did a longitudinal Study of Aging looked at the midlife body mass index and Alzheimer’s, they also went further to look at the severity of the disease. The authors of this research study found that higher BMI in middle age (50 years of age) was associated with an earlier onset of Alzheimer disease as well as higher measures of the disease’s severity.

This contributed to more amyloid deposition which is a contributing factor of the onset Alzheimer disease in the brain of patients with a higher midlife BMI, as compared with those who had a healthy BMI at age 50. This indicates a more severe form of the disease. The researchers concluded that a healthy BMI at midlife may thus delay the onset of Alzheimer disease.

Some earlier studies have consistently shown that obesity is associated with dementia. In another study similar to the one above, but conducted in Eastern Finland, researchers followed patients for a total of 26 years, measuring their BMI at an average age of 50 as well as later, at an average age of 71. The researchers observed which patients developed dementia later in life, and found that, again, higher midlife BMI was associated with a higher risk of dementia and Alzheimer disease. You should know that dementia are symptoms associated with memory loss and confusion while Alzheimer is a  disease where thinking is impaired and behavior changes are dramatically caused by changes in the brain. We do know that dementia can sometimes be a precursor to Alzheimer’s disease. An analysis study from Swedish researchers concluded that “both overweight and obesity at midlife independently increase the risk of dementia and Alzheimer disease.” Some studied also concluded that diabetes, which is an obesity-related disorder, may lead to an earlier onset of dementia. With all of this evidence it is safe to say that overweight and obesity at midlife puts one at a higher risk of developing dementia as well as an earlier onset of Alzheimer disease.

The issue for anyone who is in midlife is that this is a time when many baby boomers have a tendency to gain weight, as metabolism slows down a bit, and they might not be moving as much as they should. With this in mind it is clear to see how utterly important it is to get off of the couch and move your body on a daily basis, we need to live a more active lifestyle and eat more nutritious foods that are good for us and will maintain brain function in our golden years. As we mature and get older keeping your body as well as you mind healthy is the sure way to longer life!

 

Winter Eating, YOU need to say Sane!

Fall is upon us and as the weather begins to change so do our eating habits and for most waistlines can and do expand. Yes, we tend to eat more richer and oh so heartier foods in the winter and for some the pounds begin to pile on and the tendency is to ignore this and worry about it come spring. Let's face it, in the winter we cover our bodies from head to toe with boots, sweaters and big and bulky clothes, I mean really who sees our bodies and with that thinking comes more I just will worry about it later and so we start eating desserts, chocolate and donuts that might be in the office.  Some women tell me that they do not even get pedicures till the spring time comes around, who sees their feet. While summer brings more craving for lighters foods such as salads and smoothies in the winter we tend to want more heartier foods such as stews, chili and meatloaf with mashed potatoes. Yummy!  Think about it, what  happens months before the summer even arrives.  In April some women and a few men tend to start on some crazy quick loss diets wanting to shed that winter weight. They cut out that winter food they enjoyed and now get on a regime of tons of water, maybe skipping meals and stressing out in order to lose weight and get into a bathing suit and shorts. That factored in with so many are much more active in the warmer months by  running, hiking and biking, taking vacations to warmer climates, hanging out at the local beaches eating a lot of our meals at outside cafes and restaurants. Yes, we want to lose weight rapidly to get into that bathing suit and feel comfortable. In the winter months who does not want to curl up on the couch in our pj's before it gets dark outside and just vegetate. My friend Diane and I  had this conversation not too long ago, she told me she tends to stay in over the winter months, every year puts on a few pounds but this year she has promised herself to stay more active and get out more. She does not want to isolate like previous years. I was curious as to how she would do this and she said she has joined some groups that are active all year long and she will make every effort to join them because isolating herself  leads to sadness and depression. She will also get a workout in daily and force herself to do it.  Great idea, Diane I hope you are listening?. YOU need to stay active in the winter, get to the gym, put in a SHAPELYGIRL FITNESS DVD and let us motivate you when is it freezing outside  and not feel sorry for yourself that it is cold outside and for heavens sake do not sit and sulk and EAT! This is the year you will not hibernate like a bear in a cave. Yes, while it is more comforting to  stay indoors and either read a good book, watch TV or play on the internet  then get to the gym for a workout  this year it is time to get up and off of that couch and move your body.  So, with all of that said  it stands to reason that with the change of climate comes a different way of eating and cooking. Here is what I have learned after many years of working with women in all seasons of the year. YOU do not have to gain weight in the winter as a lot of women do. First you need to control yourself and now is the time to get ready for the winter months. Plan and prepare and do what you need to do till spring gets here again.  Oh and did I mention in all of this the holidays creep in and then most of us can go insane for 6 weeks.....NO, NO, NO this is the year of your WINTER SANITY, who is with me?

Enjoying the darkness!

Now that the weather is changing with mornings becoming chillier and the sun is taking forever to shine in the early morning I am finding it harder to get moving. Years ago I could open my eyes and in a flash I would be out the door doing something that involved any fitness activity such as running, biking and training for the next race or even teaching a fitness class but alas today I would rather enjoy the morning and stay in the moment. I have always been a morning person and while I still love the early mornings, at his point in my life I do not feel the need to burn out before 9am. Today, I have slowed down and adjusted my life to enjoy the peacefulness and calmness of life in the wee hours of the morning and I must admit I love it. What a moment of life I am living these days. While I still get up  between 5-6am I love to be quiet and enjoy what the day may bring. Prayer is how I like to start my mornings and taking the time to read scripture while just enjoying that simple cup of coffee. I am finding that I love to start my day this way. Yes, I can honestly say that  I no longer feel the need to run out the door for fear of not getting it all in. The other day I actually had a thought "I will get to the world when I get there".  Wow, what a difference from the younger woman I remember I was many years ago. I want to feel the days as I mature in life. While I still have a lot of energy and look forward to the future and the new journey that I am looking forward to with a lot of hope I am beginning to see the world around me and how fast it is moving but I am choosing to slow down to see who and what is around me. I do not know about you but in the past few years I have been questioning my existence, my passion, my life and what is happening in the world. Here is what I am learning about my life while waiting for the next move. First, enjoy the moment for what it is. Then while  waiting for the next journey do what you can to improve our passion in where you are going. Be patient and above all follow the dream~ Hey, I have to go, I am running out the door to teach a class! Be Blessed~

We are in an epidemic!

I think that most of us on some level have some understanding that obesity is linked to major health problems including hypertension, diabetes, joint problems and even cancer. Study after study results in the same prognosis, in order to live longer and happier keep your weight managed, eat better and reduce stress. Obesity can be a  major health threat no matter how you look at it. Two-thirds of people with binge eating disorder are obese or 2 out of every 3 people and that is a lot of  unhealthy humans. Constantly eating a lot of food faster than your body can burn off the calories will surely put the pounds on, this is not rocket science just basically some poor choices that need to be changed in order to live a healthy life.  Research tells us that excessive body weight is definitely associated with all kinds of medical problems and yet some  just think that the magic diet such as cleansing, smoothies and starving themselves is the key to happiness.  Wrong, this thinking is a crap shoot and the odds are stacked against you. Let's get serious for a moment ~ Take a deep breathe and repeat after me I NEED TO TAKE CARE OF ME! That means moving your body, eating 80 percent of your daily calories from good foods that are good for you and while we cannot avoid daily stress some of us need to learn how to deal with it. Mediation, Pilates and even Yoga can clear out the brain if only for a short time. However the biggest issue that needs to be addressed is the reason that we feel the need to abuse, stuff and purge our bodies as well as our minds. This behavior of emotional eating only to put on the pounds  is so complicated, this is not a magic pill you swallow and you are instantly reformed, no it is so deep and as of today science nor the fitness industry has been able to stop the increased rate of  obesity and the stats are showing us it will only get worse. We are at an all time high of fatness in this country and all of us need to take a step back and look at our lifestyle and how we live our lives. Eating for emotional reasons, stress and some of our lifestyles are making us CRAZY! I am urging you today to really begin to evaluate your life and if you need to change then begin to make SMALL changes for a healthier future!

FEELING SHAME~

The dictionary says that SHAME is a painful feeling of humiliation, distress or a painful emotion resulting from an awareness of inadequacy or guilt.  I think we can all understand how devastating  feeling SHAME would be for anyone who might experience it. This is exactly what happens when lives become undone because of some behavior that is not considered the norm. We seem to look, act and behave different. Most of the time SHAME stems from a past that follows us no matter how we hide it. For the overweight/obese person who experiences SHAME perhaps they were made fun of by siblings, parents, teachers or even neighbors. Kids in school could have bullied them and then that SHAME is acerbated because they are reminded of how imperfect they are carrying around a bigger body and not wearing a size 4 dress size. One of my clients who always felt SHAMEFUL over herself told me years ago, she would cut off her right arm to be thin. I can still remember that conversation and how horrible I felt listening to her say those words to me. As a professional women she felt that her weight was the biggest issue to overcome and she could not get a grasp on it. She tried every program and diet on the planet and yet she could never get to a comfortable weight and it became humiliating to her.  Everything she did in life revolved around her body and how she felt about herself and her constant dream of being thin.  Her attitude was very common among overweight women who felt that if they lost weight that SHAME would go away but sadly for most it does not. Losing weight is only the first step to a deep rooted emotional feeling.  I have been working with women for years in groups or individually and SHAME is one emotion that I not only hear them talk about  but it shows in how they feel about themselves. I cannot tell how devastated this makes me feel because all women are worthy of feeling good not matter what size or how much they weigh.


 We live in a visual society where women are judged by the way they look, what size they wear and how much they weigh. We want to pretend that looks and size do not matter but we all know they do. Most kids learn from childhood that being fat is like a disease. There are studies that I have read saying that some kids would pick a bully over an overweight classmate to be a friend. What have we come to in this society?. Overweight kids can sometimes feel SHAME from as early as kindergarten and it is can be overwhelming to them.
 As the world looks to Hollywood and the modeling industry for it's moral compass the devastation of feeling SHAME escalates for most overweight people. In a society where the average size is 14 but the modeling industry keep reminding us that a size 4 is the norm no wonder why women feel so  emotionally and mentally negative up about themselves.


 As a young girl, I always felt SHAME and disappointment in my life. In fact, I  cannot remember a time when I did not feel SHAME in my childhood right into  early adulthood. The SHAME of being sexually abused  from those who were suppose to be on my side and from parents who should have been protecting me, the SHAME of being from a broken family, the SHAME of my mother being asked to leave the catholic church because she was divorced, the SHAME of being fat my entire childhood but more so the SHAME of never fitting in and living a life that I felt was headed no where. Growing up the world around me looked very shattered, distorted and broken so I never felt whole. There was always something wrong or missing in my life for many years. Because my life was so toxic and spiraling downwards comfort is what I needed and it needed it immediately. Since I had no sense of family I began to turn to what was readily available and that was FOOD! Well, that was many years ago and today while I cannot say I still feel SHAME I certainly have come to grips with who I am and that my weight does not define who I am nor will I let it empower me in my life! 

Hugs, DEBRA

New Beginnings of HOPE~

Many times in my life I have gone through periods of doubt, turmoil, fear and uncertainty and some how I got past them without being crushed emotionally, however over the past three years it seemed harder to shake them off.  This time those feeling and emotions had such a  grip on me at times I was beginning to have serious negative thinking about my life that was not part of my plan. Prior to feeling such anxiety, I had always been the motivated, uplifted and inspired women that other women looked up and listened to. I was the go to girl who was always on top of being positive even in the trenches of life but the death of my dearest friend Gere, turning sixty, moving and starting a new job was so overwhelming. I could feel things beginning to unravel but I put them on the back burner. In 2012, after weeks of me believing for a total healing, I lost my dearest friend Gere who I met at age fourteen, we were pinky blood  sisters born on the same day. We met in the cafeteria as freshmen in high school and remained friends till she took her last breath. The pain of her death gripped me so tight that I could sometimes feel myself being strangled. The question of WHY was always on my mind. I would think about it, ponder on it,  journal about it and yet could not find any relief as my heart ached over this loss I felt.  Losing Gere was like losing a sister we were that connected. While  I never understood the WHY of it all God says we are to trust him and that is how I made it through the past three years. Gere was my go to girl when I needed to lean on someone. Gere and I bounced every issue off of each other that women talk about such as relationships, love and family and even retirement. We sometimes just checked in and other days we would  go deep with life in conversation.  Turning sixty was also a big milestone for me somehow, fifty nine was great but sixty sounded well so old.  I had run my last half-marathon at fifty five and now I was turning sixty. Say it isn't so. I had a total meltdown  as I approached that day that put me into orbit most nights with tears and feelings of frustration and lonliness that I had not experienced since I was a kid. Gere and I had planned on celebrating our sixtieth birthday on a mini vacation, as we both turned sixty on the same day but she was not around and frankly I lost all interest in turning sixty alone. I then took a job that took my out of the Philadelphia area and I put my business on the back burner to persue a new venture that did not work out. While this was rough transition I do believe it gave me rest time that I needed and a clear vision about what I needed to do with my life. While  I could not bring Gere back or get any younger I could move forward in my life and get back to my passion, helping women and that is exactly what the future holds for me. Today I am so hopeful, more motivated and feel so inspired to move forward free from fear and anxiety. I am certainly not saying I will no longer have the challenges, set backs and mountains to move somewhere in the future but I can this, without HOPE there is no future for any of us. I am GRATEFUL for NEW BEGINNINGS OF HOPE~

DIETING, DIETING, and more DIETING, Will I ever feel better?

Every day millions of women are on  a "DIET" or looking for that perfect weight loss program in order to feel better about themselves. For most women the learning curve of feeling great centers around how much they weigh and what they look like. For centuries women have been clamoring to find the perfect avenue to thinness and a slender body. Losing weight makes some women feel like they won an Oscar, while for others the satisfaction of weight loss is only a band aid to a bigger ailment. Most times it is not about weight but about a history of learning at an early age that we somehow are never being good enough leading us to feel unworthy about our bodies and the cure for that is to be thin. This mindset creates a negative view of oneself that even the most educated would not be able to contain rationally. Feeling like you failed  is then only a thought away and making a women feel like she has committed a crime. I have been working with women and running groups for over 20 years and I repeatedly hear the phrase I was "BAD" today. Did you  committ a crime and now you should be punished? Tell me, exactly what crime was committed? Most women are trained to think negatively about ourselves from the first cookie that ever goes close the mouth. This behavior and thinking then resonates into I cannot control myself and therefore I am a horrible women and need to hate and loathe myself.  In a society that stresses body perfection anyone can see how this happens without us even thinking about it. What an emotion disaster.  This is the emotionally  harmful aspect of dieting and fooling around with what I call "DAMAGING DIETING". Yes, we tend to think that the fault lies within us and and that the only answer is to try to figure out what we did wrong. Diet's not only are restrictive and controlling but long term they are so damaging psychologically. They make any women feel like she did  something wrong instead of understanding that one remedy does not work for all of the population that it is suppose to service.  Women have been told for centuries that we are just not good enough as we are and we need to be prettier, thinner and more successful to feel great about who we are. Most women think that dieting is the answer to all of their problems. If a women can just lose weight she somehow will feel ok about herself, more approved, loved and accepted by family, friends and society.

None of the newest DIETS, shakes, powders, pills, cleanses, workouts or whatever else is popular today will work LONG TERM. You have to come to grips with  the WHY's of eating. . Many years ago I learned that if  I let my past rule my present then my future would suffer until I came to terms with the issues that were controlling my BINGING, CRAVINGS AND OVEREATING. I learned being MINDFUL about my behaviors has worked wonders for me over the past 20 plus years the more I practice it the better my health and wellness became, it was just that simple. Initially, realizing that I needed to  DIVORCE what I thought I could not live without became OVERWHELMING, however after many years of enjoying great health and feeling terrific was so gratifying and really helped to look at every day as a new possibility in life.  It is so important that you are in touch with yourself so that you make better choices. Using MINDFUL techniques in any decision in life is really knowing what you need and works for you but using it for health purposes will make your life feel AMAZING because you are in control of yourself~

Gratitude for 2015

  As the New Year begins, women everywhere will be bombarded with posts, emails, and even texts focusing on all sort of quick weight loss promising beauty, thinness, and look younger instantly. While others will be hearing about the latest workout on how to get you in shape with six packs abs in days and have the body of your dreams in no time. All kinds of crazy and unhealthy diets, cleanses, clean eating, shakes, workout programs, all geared to deplete your wallet as well as make your goals initially seem realistic but eventually become unattainable. Once that happens, a lot of women will most likely spiral down with a negative mindset and on a path to quitting, giving up and feel like a failure. This does not have to be. It is time to women to find freedom and happiness from all of this emotional stress from all of these messages. As many of you know, I have devoted my adult life to helping women to lose weight, get fit and healthy, eat better and feel better about themselves. While I still love what I do, years ago I came to the conclusion both professional as well personally that good health, weight loss and fitness is and HAS to be a year round commitment. Then you will begin to be FREE to have a happier, healthier body as well as a healthy emotional state of wellbeing. This is not any easy fix, it is a lifestyle that you have to make a commitment to you to do your very best and on those days you cannot, you weather the storm, hang tight and begin again next time. Life is filled with ups and downs but it is vitally important for you to stay focused and walk thru the valley only to come out of the tunnel. 

 I have been preaching this for years and still stand by this practice and passion I have today. However, the research is now clear. The commercial weight loss industry has actually contributed to making you stay overweight and unhealthy in many ways. Diets promise a better you but we all know that diets are not the way to a happy, healthy life. What you need to do is have a sound judgment and make choices that work for you every day. The portions at restaurants as enormous, you are tempted in every way, it is becoming socially acceptable in a lot of circles to be overweight and so more people are at a higher weigh compared to 20 years ago. The stress you face daily can add to overeating and bingeing so mindlessly you eat at the first sign of any distress. Women have had battles with food for years but I have noticed it now increasing as commercials, magazines and TV are telling you that you need to be thin and beautiful. Got a wrinkle, your local salesperson on QVC and HSN will help you to get rid of it thus making you feel better. Get the newest workout and let that solved all of your problems. Really, if it only were that easy. Let’s get real about this, you need to accept yourself with the belief that you will work towards becoming a better you every day. YOU will eat as best you can, YOU will get exercise in and you will begin to feel GRATITUDE FOR WHO YOU ARE. As this year comes in, take time to stop and be grateful for your life.   

 

SUMMER EATING TIPS

My idea of a great summer Saturday is an early power walking workout with Chanel at the Art Museum. Summer eating especially while on vacation is something we all look forward to.  There are those special foods that most of us associate with happy summer times.   But without some planning it’s easy to pack on the pounds.  So here are my summer eating tips that can keep vacation fun and keep you healthy. 

Conscious Eating:  This is essential so that you are aware of everything that’s going in your mouth and can plan accordingly.  If you eat consciously, you’ll actually enjoy your food more and can plan for treats without sabotaging yourself by overdoing it.  

Traveling:  Car trips can be a caloric disaster.  It’s so easy to stop at every convenience store or fast food restaurant along the way.  Instead, pack a cooler with healthy snacks of nuts, fruits, granola and bottles of water.  If you want those French fries on the Boardwalk later, why not make sensible choices earlier in the day? 

Breakfast:  I can’t stress enough how important breakfast is on vacation.  Having a good first meal (and I don’t mean the pancake house every day) will give you energy and prevent the extreme hunger that can lead to making poor food choices. This is especially true for beach-goers.  Do not head to the beach without eating.  You can become dehydrated and feel lightheaded from having no fuel in your body.  The risk is that you’ll be so hungry that you pounce on the first hot dog or ice cream cone you see when you leave the beach.  Eating a piece of fruit, some cereal or yogurt in the morning is the way to go. 

Barbecues:  I just love a great summer barbecue; hanging out with friends, family and eating that smoky, grilled food.  Be conscious of the menu and make your choices wisely.  Have a burger, but opt for a turkey burger, if possible, and think about skipping the roll.  Eat the veggies, green salad and watermelon and be conservative with potato or macaroni salads made with mayonnaise.  There is nothing wrong with having a taste of everything but don’t overload your plate.  This isn’t your last supper.  Leave the party feeling good, not feeling like “Get me to the couch, I’m so stuffed I can’t breathe!” 

Drinking:  We forget that beverages can be sugary and very fattening.  Limit alcoholic beverages like Pina Colada"s to special occasions.  They taste wonderful, but are extremely high in empty calories.  Soft drinks with sugar are really liquid candy.  Even some of those flavored iced coffees are loaded with hidden fats and calories.  A big glass of unsweetened ice tea with lemon, orange or mint leaves is a good way to enjoy a cool refreshing drink.  And drink plenty of water, as it will cool you down and hydrate the body especially during a workout.  

6.    

          Exercise:  If you have been working out all winter, terrific.  But if not, summer is the perfect time to get started.  So have your favorite Kohr Brother’s custard.  But burn off the calories.  Walk, swim or join my ShapelyGirl Workout classes. As I tell my clients: Get off the couch.  Move, breathe and transform yourself.

Debra Mazda, M.Ed. is an Exercise Physiologist, Certified Personal Trainer and President of ShapelyGirl Fitness™, a motivational fitness company which includes workout DVD’s, inspirational CD’s, and an online community (www.debramazda.com).  Debra lost 140 pounds 25 years ago by embracing exercise and healthy eating.  E-mail her debramazda@live.com

A Rare Friendship

June 2013

About 3 months ago, I began to “LOSE MY VOICE”, my passion and my connection to everything in my life, including myself.  Sadness and anxiety began to overwhelm me and I could feel myself slowly declining from any dream or vision that had part of my world for the past 25 years. I really knew I was in trouble when I began to eat poorly and my workouts were becoming a chore and not the love or movement my body needed to live a healthy life. I could not even journal as writing about my feelings was how I survived in the past especially when I felt a disconnect from life.  A very negative mindset began to arise and my world began to crumble.  How was this happening?  First, my past began to emerge, years of abuse that I left behind came back to haunt me. That coincided with a physical injury that was so painful that it left me helpless for weeks. I have never had an injury of this magnitude before, especially an injury that could have ended my fitness career. That scared me.  However, the most overwhelming issue I was trying to grasp on to was the death of my dearest friend Gere in October 2012. It was not until after the holidays when I realized how permanent her death was, but what I really did not know was how I was going to emotionally deal with this loss or recover from her death.  Gere and I met in 1968 when we were both freshmen in high school. Gere was bubbly, kind, loving and a very unique person who would help, mold and shape my life in a very special way.  We were two silly girls who loved life, very unconventional in our thinking and born rebels. We were drawn together and instantly connected in a very extraordinary way. Soon after we met, and realizing we had the same birthday we became pinky blood sisters. For two gritty girls our friendship became an instant sisterhood, the kind that would whether any storm and last throughout 44 years.  In fact, we were soul mates, connected for life. Gere lived one parish over from me and that meant we could see each other outside of school and we did. I spent many days with her and her family who became like my own. Her parents and sisters, who I adored, were kind and loving and they welcomed me with open arms.  Prior to her death, Gere had been in a coma for almost 5 weeks.  I was at the hospital daily reading her books, singing to her, dancing to the disco music we loved, reading scripture, talking about God’s love for her, telling her jokes, holding her hand, talking about life but mostly I cried and prayed non- stop for her healing.  Every day, I could feel her love and God’s angels in that room while I was there and I know that time brought me even closer to her.  Still, for weeks I was in fog, crying, God help me out, how and why did this happen, what was I to see or learn from this? In the end, Plenty!  When she died I was devastated and was having trouble truly grasping on to the permanent absence that would now unfold in my life. I had to seek GOD for answers because no human could make me feel better or help me make any sense out of her death.  While we all have our own way of expressing what we think death is and the bible is very clear as to what awaits us, as I think about eternity I can only imagine.  We all hope in the end we are good enough to spend it with a merciful God but I know that one day we all stand in judgment. I knew that was where Gere was headed toward to meet her creator.  As I watched Gere in bed day after day I felt helpless to do anything but be there.  It was then I really needed to trust and believe God had a plan for her as he does for me and I so needed to accept this. As the weeks went on I finally found the peace I needed spending time in prayer and reading scripture to comfort me.  Then, March 16^th came, our 59^th birthday. Sharing the same birthday every year we would celebrate together even if it meant a cup of coffee together.  But not this year, I would go solo and it was not sitting well with me.  Like I said, I could not quite grasp onto the bigger picture of her not being here anymore. No more phone calls, no more dinners,  no more girl talk or sleep overs, it all ended on that dreadful day when I received the news. However, even now as I sit and write about my Gere I can still feel her love. Gere was all about love, compassion and forgiveness; she talked, lived and practiced it. Some may say that is a weakness but in reality it is a way to free ourselves to really love and that is what we all want, to feel love.  Gere and I were planning our 60^th birthday next year and we decided we would both go to the Adirondacks together.  Next year on March 16th I will celebrate both of our lives  because knowing Gere and being with her a short amount of time has  made me realize that life is so precious, we never know what is around the corner and that love and forgiveness is the only way to true happiness.  I can honestly say I felt true love from Gere who was my special ANGEL and always there when I needed comfort or compassion. Gere was a true friend. You see, a true friend is not only there in the good times but will always be there when you fall down. She lifted me up time after time and she is my heart forever. As for me, I am feeling better than ever.  I always knew that I would come back stronger as I have done time after time.  While I was shaken up for a while, I knew deep down inside I would get up again and start over.  So, after these few months of physical, emotional, and mental CHALLENGES and SET BACKS I am standing tall once again. I can honestly say that between a great chiropractor, some acupuncture, journaling, rest, prayer to a GOD who promises to protect me I can say I feel better than ever.  There is not a day that goes by Gere is not remembered, I feel her presence with me everyday.  I know I will see her again someday.  Gere has taught me that kindness, forgiveness and love will override any fear we might in this life and that I serve a God who loves us all, especially in our darkest hour.

Debra